Weakness & Power

The following is an article I wrote for the Calvary Chapel Natomas emagazine called "CCN Connect Magazine" with the help of a fellow sister and editor extradonair. http://www.ccnatomas.com/index.php/about/ccn-connect-mag

I also do not own the above picture, any rights or credit to the image.

Like many Christians, I love what Paul says in Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." These words always seem so encouraging and empowering, don't they? And yet there are times when I wonder, "If I can do all things through Christ, why do I fail so often? Why do I get exhausted in ministry? Why does it feel like difficult tasks chew me up and spit me out? Why does it often feel like my strength is nowhere to be found?

Yet in these very questions lie the answers to my dilemma. If I am honest with myself, and if you are honest with yourself, we'd both have to admit that the operative word we're tempted to focus on in verse 13 is "I". I'll tell you right now, it's my favorite part. Why? Because my carnal nature loves to feel self-empowered and is too often, proud of it. My pride and independent spirit join forces and in that moment, who needs God?

But something I have noticed as I grow in my relationship to Christ: God never strengthens those who think they don't need His assistance. End of story! And I'm not the only one to reach this conclusion. The same confident saint who wrote Philippians 4:13 also wrote 2 Corinthians 12:9 which reads, "He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."

Philippians 4:13 is one of those verses well-meaning Christians toss into virtually every difficult circumstance. But I wonder how many believers ever think about how these two verses are connected. Human weakness does not automatically qualify us to receive God's strength any more than being human automatically qualifies us to receive eternal life.We must choose to ask for and receive both or gain neither.

There must be a recognition of and surrender to the reality of our utter depravity apart from our Creator. And we must ask for and by faith receive God's supernatural strength which will enable us to do what the natural man cannot. Strength from Christ is the only strength that will allow us to "do all things", and the only way we will ever personally experience this powerful truth is when we humble ourselves and confess our need.

Over the past few weeks, God has given me the opportunity to understand this truth in a deeper, more personal way. Life just seemed to get harder and harder with each passing day. And I cam to a point where I'd had enough. No matter how deep I dug, or how far down within my soul I tried to reach, the cupboard was always bare. There was no strength or energy left to cope with the challenges I faced.

Completely overwhelmed and exhausted, I plopped down on my couch and cried. Thank God for the presence and wisdom of godly mothers. My mother sat quietly beside me as I poured out my desperate laundry list of perceived failures and inadequacies. I was ashamed to admit, even to her, that I could not keep up with everything and didn't know what to do. My strength was gone... period.

After listening to my woes, my mother wisely replied, "Maybe God wants you here, where you have no choice but to rely on Him."

I have to confess, that is not what I wanted to hear. My pride screamed, "I don't want to be a weak person! I don't want to have to rely on anyone for anything! I want to be an 'I can do all things' kind of saint." It wasn't until later that day that the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart and I finally realized that I could not know the power of His strength without first understanding my own human frailties.

No, human weakness does not automatically equal God's indwelling strength. But when a human heart chooses to admit their utter helplessness apart from their Creator; when a soul surrenders their will to God and cries out in utter despair, 'Lord I need you!', they have the immutable promise of God to answer such a plea. And I cannot be an "I can do all things" kind of saint while depending on my own strength.

The Apostle Paul, in 2 Corinthians 12:10, said, "...power is perfected in weakness...for when I am weak then I am strong." I now understand this truth better today than yesterday. How about you?

Loving the Time of Small Things

As people, I think it is in our nature to want to do big things in our lives and it only makes sense because our world is a world that seems to only recognizes big things.

As we sit in school and learn about history we are only give the “big picture” and, for the most part, we only learn of major events. We are surrounded by reports and stories of great people who are “larger than life” and have done unbelievable things. We are taught to judge success by size, big houses, big bank accounts, big reputations, big deeds, big sacrifices, and even big churches.  It is hammered into us that the “important” and “prestigious” jobs are the ones where you are doing big things everyday whether it’s saving lives as a doctor, going into space as an astronaut, or bringing entertainment to millions of people as an actor or singer. We soon realize that it is the above that get recognized and praised by “the little people”. How can we not have a “go big or go home” attitude when that idea is constantly being pushed upon us?

I admit that I believed in that lie of the world. There were somedays when I would be sitting in my cube at work thinking about when I had all these big dreams of how my life would be and I would feel like an utter failure because I was “only” an office technician. That lie even discouraged me from giving to people. Like if I found out that one of my friends desperately needed a car, I would get so discouraged because I couldn’t go out and buy them one. I would consider praying for them or giving them rides but then would think “They don’t prayer or a couple rides here and there, they need a car!” and I would end up doing nothing at all.

It’s been just recently that God has started to work this lie out of my heart.  Ephesians 1:1 starts, “Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God…” Paul is recognizing that God’s will for him, at that time in his life, was to be an apostle. The very same can be said of us and where we are in our lives, such as, “Melissa, an office technician by the will of God.”  That means that no matter what I wish I could be doing, right now God has me as an office technician and I should be working, where He has willed for me to be, for His glory. I might consider my job as insignificant and the world may agree but if I am obeying God and glorifying Him in this job then God sees it and thinks it neither small nor insignificant. God may never will for me to be famous or rich but He has willed for me to know Him, obey Him, and glorify Him, that is the biggest thing ever and God doesn’t care what setting we do it in.

 Small things may also lead to big things.
 

Luke 16:10 ¹⁰ “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.”

I used to get so frustrated when I would decide that I wanted to do something big for God but it always seemed like it took forever to get past all the small things I had to do before I got to the big thing. For example, I had a desire to go to Japan on a missions trip and I just knew that when I got there people were going to be saved left and right. But, before I could get there I had to get a passport, get checked by my doctor, fill out applications, raise money, buy my plane ticket, and on and on. All those little details that needed to be “taken care of” before I could get to Japan and do something big for God. All that was just taking care of the physical things; as a Christian, there were also a lot of seemingly small spiritual things I had to do in preparation as well. 

We always seem to forget that it is the small things that make the big things possible. It is the small things that prepare us for the big things. It would be like someone deciding that they didn’t want to bother with the schooling and they were just going to start being a doctor and operating on people. Good idea?

 Do you think that Moses would have had the faith to part the Red Sea if he hadn’t spent years and years learning to have faith in the little things? 

God, thank you so much that you prepare us and that you consider great the choices, the tasks, and the heart of everyday things.

Zechariah 4:10, “Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin…”

What is Your Price?

Ok guys, so it has actually been a whole year since I have posted anything on this blog but let’s get back on the horse shall we?

 Zechariah 11:12,13 “12 Then I said to them, “If it is agreeable to you, give me my wages; and if not, refrain.” So they weighed out for my wages thirty pieces of silver. 13 And the LORD said to me, “Throw it to the potter”—that princely price they set on me. So I took the thirty pieces of silver and threw them into the house of the LORD for the potter.”

 This verse is a prophesy referring to Judas betraying Jesus for 30 shekels of silver. There are just some people in the Bible that I have never liked, people who I have never been able to connect with or relate to mostly. Judas has always been one of those people for me. Here was a man who walked with Jesus, he spent years beside Him witnessing His love, watching His miracles, and hearing His Word. Yet, he still betrayed the Son of God for 30 pieces of silver. How in the world was I supposed to relate to that kind of person? Then, I heard a sermon on the above verses and I realized that I am a Judas.

 Judas in a sense, wasn’t selling Jesus for 30 pieces of silver, he was selling his own soul. He was selling his relationship with Jesus and condemning himself to an eternity without Him. The pastor preaching the sermon then asked, “What is your price?” At what price do I sell my relationship with Jesus?

It was really sad but I realized that I “sell” my relationship with Him for the pettiest things and that really any price is petty. I will knowingly damage my relationship with Jesus so that I can enjoy the passing pleasure of a sin. I have sold God’s presence for a half hour show that my flesh loves to watch and when Jesus has asked me to spend time getting to know Him I have sold it for a few more minutes of sleep. Our relationship with our Lord and Savior is worth more than anything that this world can offer and yet we sell it for so little.

 3 Then Judas, His betrayer, seeing that He had been condemned, was remorseful and brought back the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders, 4 saying, “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood.”

 And they said, “What is that to us? You see to it!”

 5 Then he threw down the pieces of silver in the temple and departed, and went and hanged himself. Mathew 27:3-5

 The money that Judas had betrayed Christ for became something that he didn’t want anymore. He realized that what he had sold was far greater than what he had received for it. That show I had wanted to watch might have entertained for a while but then I got bored or it ended and I had to wait until the next episode. The few more minutes of sleep weren’t that great and I was still tired or maybe it was great but once I got up it was gone and I gained nothing eternal from it. Isn’t it so like the world to say, “What is that to us? You see to it!”

I have sold my relationship with God to hang out with worldly friends who I had such fun being with but then when I was hurting or struggling they couldn’t help or disappeared saying, “What is that to us? You see to it!”

 I am just so thankful that our God is merciful and that He values a relationship with us so much that He would pay the price of His own blood, His own perfect Son to have that relationship with us. He paid the ultimate price for us, so let me not sell it for anything for everything is less than what it is worth.

 26 For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? Mathew 16:26